She’ll Be Comin’ Round the Mountain When She Cums

So, unfortunately, I can’t draw … but ever since I heard a couple coworkers mention this song I’ve had this (tad bit morbid) cartoon image stuck in my head. I’m going to attempt to describe it, and maybe one of you artistic types can run with it:

Frame One: a road spirals around a mountain peak. In midair just off one of the upper curves is a car. On the passenger side is a speech bubble that reads “NOOOO!”. On the drivers side is a speech bubble that reads “yes! yes! YES!”

Frame Two: inside the car the female driver has her head thrown back, her eyes squeezed shut, and her legs open. The male passengers eyes are bugging out, his mouth is wide open, and his hand is up the drivers dress between her legs.

The Poses at the Broadview

I recently had the opportunity to stay in a very beautiful room at the historic Broadview Hotel. The hotel is said to be haunted, especially on the eighth floor where I was staying, by a 1920’s businessman who killed his wife when he discovered her in a compromising position with another hotel guest and then leaped to his own death from the window of his eighth floor room. I did not see any ghosts, but maybe some lucky person looking in an eighth floor window thought they did!

This photoshoot is the product of my research into sexy poses. The website cited below was, by far, the most helpful. I was looking specifically for poses for curvy girls, but I tried them all, and even managed to pull off some skinny girl poses rather nicely! The lighting is terrible, but you do what you can within a tight schedule!

Ha!!! Yeah right! Next!

Website credit:

(almost) Nude in Kansas

Saw this article today:

Legalizing Toplessness for Women

Things are finally looking promising in Oz… thanks to our far more progressive neighbors to the west in Colorado.

While I want to walk out my front door topless RIGHT NOW, I know this is still ultra-conservative Kansas, and I have some justifiable fears.

~ Nobody’s been informed! The local media has been completely silent on the existence of this new legal freedom. The neighborhood would call the police… and do THEY know about this? I’m not of a mind to be the first to find out!

~ Limited information. Without perusing the actual legal document, I can hardly believe there aren’t conditions and legalese loopholes, like school zones or public complaints.

~ Loss of employment. With anti-discrimination laws in jeopardy, and companies ability to hire/fire based on lifestyle and social media, I doubt I’d be employed for very much longer… because you KNOW the media would be ALL OVER the story if I were daring enough to exercise my new legal freedom.

~ Safety!!! Not only would I worry about being sexually assaulted, I’d be worried about being harmed by over-zealous opposers of even partial nudity. Amazing how people’s OTHER morals disappear in leu of fanatic opposition to taboo lifestyles and actions. Those people seriously scare me!

So… while it’s certainly ‘clothing optional’ behind closed doors, I’m going to wait and see what happens if someone else is willing to brave this new freedom in the Land of Oz!

Nude in Bed

Having spent several days on vacation with my parents, sharing hotel rooms, therefore having to wear pajamas, my sheer pleasure at finally being home where I can sleep naked in my own bed, made me think…

I’ve slept in the nude for all but the first 12yrs or so of my life. It’s comfortable! So much so that I am irritably uncomfortable in pajamas or any other clothing when I sleep. So much so that I’m just baffled by how many people are (at best) surprised that I sleep in the nude. And so much so that many a lover has unknowingly and unwittingly made me super uncomfortable by slipping back into their boxers or briefs and (worse!) their T-shirt’s after sex and before sleep. Dude, seriously?! Look y’all, I just don’t get it! I’m in bed, naked and blogging, and have zero plans to unpack those jammies!

Nude in America

Just saying the word ‘nude’ in conversation turns the cheeks red… but WHY? Why here, in the land of the free and the oversexed, is nudity taboo? I can certainly see why it might be inconvenient; sunburn, frostbite, basic necessities, etc… but why taboo? How is it that nudity isn’t shocking in other countries, but you can get arrested here for streaking through your own back yard? How is it that art of the world features nudes of all types; paintings, sculptures, illustrations, statues… all perfectly acceptable in their rendition of human nudity, but to be ‘caught’ viewing such art sets a person in a category of utmost evil? What has happened here, in these (apparently) oh so ‘free’ United States, that nudity is synonymous only with sex, and sex synonymous only with wrongness?

As I was conversing with my lab mate, whom I consider to be my ‘work best friend’, and probably the one person who knows the most about how I think about the world, the topic of ‘art vs pornography’ came up. It’s a topic close to the surface with me at the moment, having reconnected with a long-lost schoolmate, and finding, quite by accident, that the article about a Naturist 5K I had sent him (knowing unique marathons and races were a ‘thing’ with him) was not only something he’d be interested in, but was something he’d participated in recently for the first time. The Naturist lifestyle was not something I had put a great deal of thought into, mostly on account of the fact that I never have found myself questioning whether I felt it was wrong or right… to me it just seemed natural and acceptable, and therefore there was no need to mull it over in my mind. If asked whether I’d be comfortable being naked in front of others, I’d probably say (always the cautious one) that it would depend on who it was, but in general, in the right setting, I’d be comfortable with it. But, I digress into future blog entries… the point is, while I may not live the Naturist lifestyle physically, it’s something I’ve always unquestioningly supported, even subconsciously in a way. So, obviously, art featuring nudes doesn’t raise an eyebrow with me. Primarily neither does pornography if it doesn’t go against my sense of morality (consenting adults, etc etc). Really, there is no ‘vs’ between art and pornography, as pornography is simply an artform, sadly, usually very poorly done, artistically speaking. But, that’s not an opinion for ‘public’ ears, so the conversation with my lab mate skimmed the surface; only going so far as to say that nudity was far less acceptable in American society as opposed to European society, and that the reasoning probably had to do with the Puritan roots of the first Europeans to set foot on this continent. Those roots, or whatever it was that turned nudity from natural to taboo… it runs DEEP! I proved my own point, quite unintentionally. During the conversation I could feel my face was bright red. More than anything, this actually irriated me a great deal. WHY?! How strong is this taboo that even when you completely back something it still embarrasses you? How can it have such a hold on you?! What ELSE is so subversively holding us back… as individuals, as societies, as humanity as a whole? Something to think on…

Running Blind

Yup, that’s me. At 200+lbs. ‘running’ is a foreign concept, I know, but that chick is gonna run! Thanks to a series of randomness and a long-lost-and-found acquaintance (NPE) with unforeseen similar interests, my 5k goal is set… 2020 Naturist 5k! I may end up jog-walking it, but it’s happening!

Inspiration is a funny thing… You can look for it and never find it, but it can certainly find you when you’re not looking for it!

Continue reading “Running Blind”